self weaning happens and honouring the nursing relationship

well, it appears that this pregnancy brought on a huge drop in supply
and after over 26mths of nursing c he has self weaned (although some of the weaning is surely the drop in supply during this pregnancy

i do plan on pumping milk for him for as long as his sibling nurses.

nursing my former preemie for over 2 yrs is one of the biggest accomplishments in my life so far.
and i honour it
i honour him
and a relationship that brought him from tubes and isolettes to a healthy, robust (albeit slim!) toddler.
c was stubborn about learning signs, but he picked up the one for milk early

i think back to how we started and i am really proud of myself
and that the challenges we had showed me that i had strength previously unknown to me

c would not nurse at the breast for almost 3 mths.
i pumped and pumped some more and never supplemented
i'd pump for up to an hour in one session
10-14 times a day
i learned of every possible galactogogue
herb
massage technique
pumping technique
latching technique
dietary restriction
that one could possibly learn

i would pump and cry
i would try to latch him and he'd cry
and i'd cry
i fell deep into the darkness of motherhood
the hopeless, depressed, struggling side

and then one day
magical
he latched
even though failure was the stronger bet to take
we beat the odds

and made it past 2 years

and it restored my trust in my body
in myself
i am glad and grateful to have been able to turn our struggles with nursing
into energy and action and helping other new nursing mamas in their unforeseen challenges with breastfeeding

i learned of blessings
and gratitude
and rejoicing in the small miracles
that each day can bring



all of this
reminders
from the trials to the triumph
in our long term nursing success

i celebrate the commitment of women who are extended nursers
it is not an easy path
but now that the supply is gone temporarily
i celebrate them
am grateful for the changes that they are bringing
in acceptance of something so pure and natural
and am honoured to be part of them.

so i don't forget hathor

...from my crystal healing treatment

very meaningful

from wiki

Hathor , (Hwt Hr Egyptian for Horus's enclosure), was an Ancient Egyptian goddess who personified the principles of feminine love, motherhood and joy.^[1] She was one of the most important and popular deities throughout the history of Ancient Egypt. Hathor was worshiped by Royalty and common people alike in whose tombs she is depicted as “Mistress of the West” welcoming the dead into the next life.^[2]. In other roles she was a goddess of music, dance, foreign lands and fertility who helped women in childbirth.^[2]

finally, a sensible policy - breech birthing

"C-section not best option for breech birth

The Society of Obstetricians and Gynecologists of Canada will launch program to teach physicians breech vaginal delivery"

http://www.theglobeandmail.com/life/health/c-section-not-best-option-for-breech-birth/article1186104/#article

"With the release of the new guidelines, the SOGC will launch a nationwide training program to ensure that doctors will be adequately prepared to offer vaginal breech births ."
..."The new decision to offer vaginal breech birth aligns with the SOGC promotion of normal childbirth – spontaneous labour, followed by a delivery that is not assisted by forceps, vacuum or cesarean section. In December of 2008, the society release a policy statement that included its recommendation for a development of national practice guidelines on normal childbirth.

“The safest way to deliver has always been the natural way,” said Dr. Lalonde.

“Vaginal birth is the preferred method of having a baby because a C-section in itself has complications.”"

i like this article summarizing it from the globe and mail because it also includes quotes from a local woman who has been petitioning and advocating the normalization of natural, vaginal, breech births. her passion is inspirational...

"News of the change is a boon for the Ottawa-based Coalition for Breech Birth.

“We're really, really pleased,” said Robin Guy, co-founder of the coalition.

Ms. Guy started the group after the birth of her second child in the fall of 2006. Although she had given birth to her first child at home with a midwife, Ms. Guy delivered her daughter in the hospital because of the baby's breech position.

“I was cornered into an unneeded and unwanted C-section because the obstetrician that I had didn't have the experience to catch her,” said Ms. Guy.

The aim of the coalition is to ensure that women know what their options are when it comes to breech birth. Ms. Guy believes that many women don't realize that vaginal breech births are even possible.

“Educating women is our primary goal because it takes more than just a guideline change,” she said."

there are several hospitals in ottawa that have been following this protocol for months now, but to see it codified into a position statement and real training, well it makes me tear up a little knowing that many women will now be able to avoid a co-erced (forced, really) c-section for a slightly less usual, but still normal birth presentation. several midwives already do breech births (mostly at home, and if the presentation is frank or complete)

there are several instances where vaginal birth will still be considered too risky - preemie (check), footling with presentation of one foot first in the canal (check - and less than 1 in 100 breech presentations are this), and other reasons where a c-section would normally be warranted.

sure there will be an adjustment period, but this has to be some of the best birthing news to arrive in a long time. it makes my heart sing to think that even one woman can avoid the trauma of major abdominal surgery and have her natural, bum first baby!

now on to improving vbac rates!

the stuff that dreams are made of

i have such vivid dreams when i am pregnant
and yet i never write them down
only to be forgotton a few waking hours later

so - my blog is here - think i'll start writing them down
and see what messages come in dreams

already last night's dreams are slipping away
but a brief outline of one i remember
is going to a place i thought was the science centre
and they were doing renos and i said let's come back when it's all done
but went inside with c and steve anyhow
and all of a sudden it was just me and c
and it looked a bit like the inside of the eaton centre
except for a humid, jungle feel
and people were lined up
around corners
and down stairs
for some exhibit
i don't know what

and i was thinking i wanted to go but didn't know what it was
but was concerned about the wait
and an antsy c
and the dream ended
i don't know if we waited or not

trying to remember how i felt
was i anxious or excited, frustrated or worried

i'll get better at writing these things down

thank you for nursing in public

was reading the blog kind over matter and really like their nursing in public cards

it basically is a printable card to give to nip'ers to thank them for nursing in public

here's the link to the thank you cards

i think i would have been blown away if i had been given one of these while nursing in public. so rarely do we get positive feedback, usually just tolerated or sometimes stared at.

what a beautiful idea...